Seriously?

It is really the evening of December 23? Where has the time gone? I’ve been out of school for 3 weeks except for the paper I wrote and dropped off and it has flown by on eagles wings. I have only 2 weeks and 5 days before I have to start up again……yesterday my day was ruined when I got my spring semester parking pass in the mail, I know when that comes it is time to start thinking about school again.

I can say I have managed to do some of the things that were on my want to do list, but not as many as I had hoped for. I know that next week will be spent on planning out the first few weeks of the kids schooling and I will have to finish reading that book and writing that book review. I should have been done by now.

I sit here and listen to TSO and wonder when Jesus is coming back and can’t it be tomorrow night? I long to see him in person and be done with this life. The one thing I came away with in the Purpose Driven Life study that i did almost 6 years ago was that this is not my true home and it is becoming more apparent as I grow in the Lord.

Today the husband and I escaped the kids and did a bit of last minute shopping, both for presents and food. I still need to make a list for him to bring home stuff…….I should try to stop by the mil’s tomorrow night but not sure if I will be able to. I know she would love to see the kids all dressed up. Maybe it will work out.

Lately, the boys have been at a friends house and the littles are quiet. I have both longed and dreaded the quiet…..longed for the break of noise and chaos but dread the time of it becoming permanent. I have so many things that I would like to do but somehow they seem meaningless with the thought of no little ones running through the house, creating mayhem. While I still have 13 years of day to day parenting ahead of me, I miss them already. I know that one of the reasons why the Lord pushed me into going back to school was to fulfill both his purpose for my life and to help me deal with not being a mom after over 4 decades. By the time the Peanut is 18, my oldest will be 44 and a half……just a 2 years younger than I am right now. Such a long time of parenting and that time both drags with troublesome children and flies by with the easy children, making me both anxious and sad. Why can’t I bottle up the soul touching moments and erase the heart wrenching ones?

I think the family photos we took last week have really hit home that my children are growing up and I’m not quite ready for that all the time. I long to stop time for just a bit and enjoy this time for when I’m old, one of the reasons why I take so many photos of my kids….trying to stop that inevitable passage. It never works, but at least I have something tangible to hold onto. I think that is one reason why I scrapbook the kids photos every year…..it is a gift for them to have and me to ponder and remember.

This post was supposed to be about how quickly time has past but as is the norm for me, it is about things that are deep inside of me that at times spurt out unasked and unwanted.

I will end this with the prayers for all of my friend both in real life and online that you and your families have a Blessed Christmas Day and a Prosperous New Year.

Merry Christmas and please remember to give thanks to the Lord for all of his blessings.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s